My Raw Evolution - Continued
Copyright © 2007 Nora Lenz

74 month update
The last two years have brought some challenges but also some victories and a gradual but predictable increase in my energy and well being, as I strive to improve my eating and other lifestyle habits. In the challenge department, I have to confess I sometimes have the irrational feeling that I’ve done nothing at all to address my eating issues (which, to clarify, are typical of what is “normal” in our culture), because I still have to remind myself not to eat when my stomach growls or if I feel weak. Fortunately both symptoms are a lot less severe than they used to be. Nevertheless, the life-long habit of eating to suppress them is very strong and I’m reminded everyday of how slow it is to die. (For anyone reading this who hasn’t already read my essay on “emotional eating”, I encourage you to do so for a better understanding of the problem of food addiction.)

Among my victories is the ability to do without food till mid morning without feeling weak and irritable. Now, even though I still have mild tummy rumbles, as well as other minor symptoms that I used to mistake for hunger, I am usually patient, energetic and clear-minded in the morning. In fact, many times after I eat I notice a slight drop in my energy, clarity of mind and mood, when the reverse used to be true. This is definitely a sign of returning vitality.

Besides delaying breakfast, some other specific habits I’ve been working on are leaving the house without food, allowing my food stores at home to completely deplete, not eating while driving and skipping dinner. Another thing I’m working on is eating only one food and not eating again until that food has been well digested, 3-4 hours or more, depending on the food. It is one thing to mono-eat but eating constantly or even frequently causes foods to encounter one another in the digestive tract, which presents the same problems as actually eating the foods together. Food becomes waste if it doesn’t digest because it is held up by other foods. The intestinal membranes respond to this by retaining their thickened, hardened walls to protect the body from absorbing the poisonous by-products of decomposing food. If a person makes a practice of mixing foods, whether these are eaten together or combined in the stomach because of too frequent eating, the result can be impeded healing of the digestive tract.

One symptom I’ve noticed when I eat too frequently is an intense, unquenchable thirst. I find myself eating sometimes when I have this symptom, but I am becoming more aware of the importance of not doing so. When fluid reserves are depleted due to perspiration and respiration, thirst can properly be quenched by eating juicy fruit. However, the thirst I’m describing is the result of the body over-expending fluids on digestion and dilution of the poisonous waste products of food that can’t be used by my body, and is a sign that I’m overeating and/or eating too frequently. Eating more won’t help, no matter how much water there is in the food. So, I’ve been consciously trying to wait until my saliva returns before eating. I notice how pleasant my mouth tastes and how good I feel when I do this.

I’ve been finding that my sleep is much better when I eat only fruit and tender greens and stop eating by 5 pm. On days when I do eat durian or a fatty meal (like nuts or a salad with dressing), I eat them early enough so that I feel slightly “hungry” by the time I go to bed. I try to eat durian or nuts no later than 3 pm. When I’ve attempted this in the past, I often couldn’t resist having another meal in the evening as well. I’m finding now that I can skip the evening meal if I keep busy.

I’ve also identified a bad habit that I’ve developed over the course of my transition -- planning a heavy meal at the end of the day. Although for many years this served the useful purpose of preventing me from eating impulsively late in the day when I was in the habit of eating a big meal, I’m finding now that planning meals in general is something I need to move away from. Meal planning itself is an unhealthful practice because it has nothing at all to do with hunger. As unconventional as it may seem, eating should be done spontaneously, when and as hunger strikes and at no other time.

I’ve also been working on giving my body a break when it needs it, even when doing so messes up my plans. I’m one who usually schedules lots of activities everyday, even when I’m not working, because I like being active and feeling productive. It occasionally happens that I’ll plan a whole day or morning of projects and find that my body just isn’t into it. In the past what I would do is eat to re-energize (really re-stimulate) and forge ahead with my plans. I now think it’s very important to respect my body’s signals and not try to override them. I had a day last weekend when I had planned to undertake a major housecleaning project, except that when I woke up that morning, my energy was low. Rather than either eat or not work at all, I avoided eating and still went ahead with the project. But when I needed to rest, I took a few minutes to lie down. It made my project go much slower but that’s okay. My body has its own schedule, and I have to give it the reins if I’m going to reach the level of health I desire.

I know that I’m still overeating, even though I suspect the quantity of food I’m consuming would not be sufficient to fulfill the caloric requirements for a woman of my size and activity level according to conventional standards, even those that are used by some in the raw food community. For example, yesterday I had 6 small grapefruits, 1.5 pounds of cherries, 1 cantaloupe and 4 persimmons. If I’d skipped the final meal, I’d be feeling even better than I do this morning. Although it might be surprising that someone who eats as little as I do would be concerned about overeating, I’ve come to know through my own experience, research and watching other long-term successful raw fooders that humans require very little food when the body approaches maximum efficiency, as it does when a person’s been eating only raw, simply-combined, biologically-appropriate foods for years. There is also the evidence provided by the fruit-eating, long-lived peoples around the world who are active from dawn till nightfall and whose male members typically consume only 1500 calories per day. What all this says to me is that a relatively sedentary (more about my physical activity level later) female might be sufficiently fed on only 1,000 calories. There is any number of raw gurus who would say that this is a surefire recipe for slow starvation, but the plain fact is that there are very few raw teachers who have thoroughly resolved their own addiction issues, and, as a consequence, allow their own overeating tendencies and other bad habits to influence their recommendations to others. I hasten to add that I haven’t yet completely resolved my ‘issues’ either, but I at least recognize that I have them, and I have put into place the practices which lead to recovery.

Nobody is talking to raw fooders about the importance of decreasing consumption over time. As a result, many people experiencing symptoms after 4-6 years of being raw are not able to figure out what they’re doing wrong. In the majority of cases, when other mistakes are ruled out, the symptoms are attributable to overeating. As digestive efficiency increases, if the level of consumption is not decreased proportionately, symptoms will be experienced as the body attempts to deal with the excess. Sometimes overeating long-term raw fooders accidentally stumble upon ways to deal with the negative effects, like eating more greens (less calories) or exercising more, and these can help resolve symptoms in the short term. Ultimately, however, these are symptomatic approaches. The real answer lies in learning to eat LESS. Eating less is a necessary part of overcoming food addiction.

We’ve all heard the fear-inducing stories about people “running into problems” after years of being raw, especially those who eat a high fruit diet. Many people use these examples as evidence that fruit is inadequate as a primary food source. That is not the case at all, however. Fruit is very dilute, and often people on a high fruit diet make the mistake of thinking this means they must eat constantly or even frequently in order to “get enough” nutrients or calories. To do so is not only unnecessary, it is destructive of health. Fruit may be dilute compared to cooked food or even other raw foods, but it is very fuel rich. That people who overeat fruit ultimately experience symptoms should not give rise to doubts about whether a fruit-based diet is the correct one for all humans, physiologically. It is, in fact, only evidence of how easy it is to fuel a healthy human body on fruit.

With regard to determining how much to eat, the standard unit of measure that we use for food presents a bit of a problem, too. Calories are nothing more than the amount of heat that is generated when food is burned. Although we say that our bodies “burn” the foods we eat, the fact is that the processes of digestion and metabolism are actually much different from simple burning. The calorie has become the unquestioned way that we calculate how much energy our bodies can get from a food. But there is no reason to suppose this information is any more valid than the other incorrect ideas that have come from modern nutritional theory. The calorie is all we have and I use it too, but when long-term, successful, simple-eating raw fooders can lead extremely active lives for months and years consuming comparatively little food AND the longest-lived people in the world are not only the most active but also the ones who eat the least, there’s clearly something going on that is outside conventional understanding about how much food it really takes to sustain the highest levels of health.

I’ve eaten a lot, and I’ve eaten very little, and I prefer the way I feel when I eat less. When I do, I wake up in the morning with a clear mind and a positive outlook. I look forward to the day and am excited about the things I’m going to do. When I overeat, even when I just overeat fruit, I wake up with excess mucus, negative thoughts and worries, and sometimes I suffer insomnia. For many years I ate fruit almost constantly to avoid false hunger and to keep from eating too much fat. This worked fine as a transition strategy, but as my body has become cleaner, more vital and sensitive, it’s not letting me get away with that anymore.

Nowadays, my moods are always a clear indicator of how I’m doing with my diet. In my cooked past, I had problems with mood swings. Even earlier in my transition, it used to be that no matter what I did I had highs and lows. But now if my diet is good, my mood is good. This makes sense, since the mind is always cooperating with the body. When the body is so busy digesting food or eliminating un-needed food that insufficient energy remains for outward activities, it’s the mind’s job to prioritize. In cooked-food-eaters so predisposed, chronic depression is the result of overburdening the body on an ongoing basis. Often, chronically depressed people just want to stay in bed all day. When I overburden my body, I get a very mild and temporary version of the same thing, including the desire to take on less activity and the tendency to push things away that I would otherwise care about.

The bottom line with regard to my consumption level is that I allow myself to be guided by the evidence supplied by my body, even while I’m not always successful at following it, rather than listen to recommendations from people who use calorie charts or other flawed contrivances to determine how much to eat.

Right now it’s mid-winter and I’ve been living mostly on grapefruits and persimmons. I brought several hundred pounds of Hachiya persimmons back from California over Thanksgiving and they are close to running out (I sold all but about 150 pounds). In addition, I’ve been eating Maradol papayas, cherimoyas, melons, frozen durian, Bosc pears, grapes, Chilean cherries, iceberg lettuce, romaine (very infrequently) and celery. True to form, my desire for fats and nuts is back with the cold weather but I’m finding it easier to eat less of them this year. It’s interesting that each year I have a yen for a different nut. A couple years ago it was pistachios, last year it was pine nuts and this year it’s cashews. I eat nuts only once or twice a week, and this year I’ve been eating them whole and unprocessed more often than not, which is different from previous winters when I would make salad dressings and veggie dips. I have frozen durian about once a week, and I only eat it if it tastes fabulous. I’ve found that when it even vaguely has that unpleasant tang of fermentation, my body has a more difficult time digesting it, so when I get one like that I cut my losses and throw it out.

I continue to find inspiration from my observations of animals, wild and domestic. Every other species on earth knows precisely what to eat, when and how much. There is an unquestioned wisdom that drives squirrels to eat nuts and rabbits to eat grass. They don’t need anybody to tell them that if something tastes bad to them, they should put it in a blender with something that tastes good and the indigestible substance in the ‘food’ that caused the bitter or bad taste will be magically removed. Only civilized humans could not only invent such a practice but actually have the cheek to represent it as natural or beneficial to health.

Domestic animals don’t have many opportunities to choose their own foods but when my dog or cat encounter something they recognize as food, I allow them to have it as long as it’s not human-created. For example, when my cat comes around wanting some of my melon or avocado, I give him some. And when we’re hiking and my dog comes across horse droppings or wild carrion, I allow him to eat some if he wants to. Even though dogs and cats are domesticated and dependent, their bodies are not products of civilization. They are at least partially in tune with their primordial selves and they retain the same abilities as their wild counterparts to select foods, as long as we limit their choices to only natural ones.

Comparing wild and domestic animals is somewhat analogous to a comparison of wild and cultivated foods. While domestic dogs aren’t as smart or autonomous as wolves, and cultivated foods are inferior to wild foods, neither are of human origin. Nature still produces them. We’re not that smart yet. Whether the conditions were created spontaneously by nature or artificially by humans, the fruit that is produced by those conditions is natural, and if our senses tell us that it’s food, we may rely 100% on that feedback. Our modern foods may not be as good as foods were 100,000 years ago, but the good news is they don’t have to be in order for us to thrive on them. I didn’t get healthy eating wild foods, or foods that were grown eons ago, I did it eating ordinary supermarket food, and most of it wasn’t even organic.

None of this is to say that supermarket food is the best food on earth. Ripeness is very important and it’s difficult to find ripe fruit in supermarkets. And, as health returns, it becomes increasingly important to eat ripe fruit because the body becomes more efficient, allowing more of the acids in unripe fruit to enter the bloodstream. To balance the pH, the body will draw minerals from the bones and teeth. Overeating can cause an overall acidic condition of the body, and so can eating unripe fruit. It’s not an insurmountable problem, however, even for a raw fooder living in the north in winter. All we have to do is stick with foods that ripen very well off the tree or vine, or that are picked ripe, like bananas, dates, cherimoyas, pears, apples, grapes (which should be eaten only if they’re sweet), celery, lettuce, carefully selected melons and a few others.

Like everyone else, I’ve heard all the stories about soil ‘deficiency’ and how nutritionally inadequate cultivated foods are, and there may be evidence to support this. I do know that I’ve tried growing food in truly deficient soil and I can tell you that it doesn’t produce food at all. I suppose there are all degrees of deficiency, but I’m more inclined to trust my senses than a huckster trying to convince me my food isn’t adequate so I’ll buy his/her supplements. When I’m in a room that’s too warm, I don’t question whether my body is a good judge of such things just because the heat is created by a human invention. When I see a piece of art that I find attractive, I don’t wonder about my ability to appreciate beauty because the item was produced by humans. There are a thousand other examples, all of which point to our hypocrisy in refusing to relegate the job of food selection to our very wise and reliable senses. The birds and other animals that “steal” cultivated foods from our farms and orchards don’t obsess about nutrient deficiency. When I was picking persimmons in California, I noted the best-tasting fruits on the tree were the ones that had gaping holes where birds had been partaking. (Isn’t it crazy that most people in our culture regard a piece of bird-picked fruit as inedible?) Birds and other animals know that what tastes, smells and feels good really IS good. We can follow their lead.

We’ve also heard the claims that modern food growers are ‘deliberately’ producing sweeter foods. Personally, I haven’t done any research to determine whether this is true. Even if it is, I’m not so sure it’s a bad thing. To the extent that manipulating foods to make them more visually attractive or shelf-stable also changes their natural balance, it IS generally a bad practice. However, sugar is the one nutrient that our bodies need and want most, and if more of it is present in the food, that only means we don’t have to eat as much of the food. Compared to sugar, our needs for other nutrients are miniscule. Did you know that all of the vitamins that the human body requires for an entire year can fit in a thimble? Fruit (even conventionally grown fruit) provides such an abundance of nutrients that we can be assured of being well nourished even if we eat it in small amounts.

Sugar has developed a reputation as unhealthy because it’s been used for so long to disguise inappropriate foods. Ironically, this practice on its face is evidence that we all recognize that sweetness is one of the most important criteria that our species uses to recognize food. Our culture teaches us that suffering is virtuous, that only bad-tasting foods are healthy, and that to be “successful” in life we have to spend most of our time doing things we hate (like working). I think people who regard sweet foods as unhealthy have an underlying mistaken belief that life can’t feel good and be good at the same time.

As in past years, my weight is up to 118 pounds again this winter. I don’t worry about weight gain, of course, but I do like being leaner in the summer and I’m glad that the ‘extra’ weight falls off effortlessly in the spring. I’ve noted this year for the first time that my extremities (hands, feet, nose) are not cold all the time, which is a problem that has plagued me my whole life. This winter I’ve also had no mouth sores, which I used to have more often in the winter than summer.

My skin is still dry this winter, which points out the falseness of the myth that fats nourish and moisturize the skin, since I eat more fats in the winter than at any other time. Obviously, fats do not moisturize the skin at all; they actually interfere with the delivery of nutrients to the skin. I theorize that in many people who eat any version of the standard American diet, the abundance of fatty wastes in the bloodstream causes the symptom of dry, unhealthy, malnourished skin to be disguised because these wastes are constantly being exuded through the skin. Before this condition can exist, however, the primary channels of elimination have to be overburdened. This is why dry skin is experienced so often by new raw fooders – not only do they typically abandon the palliative and damaging practice of applying lotions to the skin, but also as the primary eliminative avenues are opened up, the true appearance of the skin is revealed. It can take a good many years on a proper diet to heal the skin completely. Lack of sunshine and dry, cold weather, as well as keeping the skin covered in layers of clothing, contribute to the problem in winter.

A few months ago I finally read “I Live on Fruit” by Essie Honiball. I was particularly interested to read of her experiences after 6 years of eating only fruit when she decided to try eating some cooked potatoes. She was surprised at how strong a hold that food still had on her after all those years on a totally raw diet. She said that when she sat down in front of the potatoes, she proceeded to eat them in an uncontrolled way, like a starving person would. The next day her tongue swelled and turned blue and she couldn’t eat anything for 3 days. This resonates with me as I’m still occasionally experiencing fleeting and rare but surprisingly intense desires for cooked foods. I know that if I indulged them I’d be back in their grip, so I have resisted, making do with nuts and durian, and it’s easy to do now because I wouldn’t think of squandering my 6-year investment in health for the momentary gratification of eating cooked food. I often talk to raw fooders who feel like failures because after years on a raw diet they’re still eating less-than-optimal foods in order to stave off cravings for cooked foods. To me it just shows what a formidable and tenacious foe we’re facing in food addiction. There is reason to be optimistic, however, if we have the patience: At the time she wrote the book, Essie Honiball had been raw for 12 years and said that she no longer had any desire at all for cooked foods!

There is so much about my life that has changed for the better and I tend to just take it for granted. I no longer think about my weight at all, after obsessing about it for my entire adult life. I never think about getting sick or worry about who’ll take care of me in my old age. I never take naps anymore. I used to want a nap everyday after lunch, and it was my normal routine to take a nap on weekends. It had nothing to do with getting enough sleep at night because I’ve always been focused on getting my 8 hours every night. And now, even when I fail to get what I need (7 hours, still), I have no inclination to nap. When I was a cooked food eater I always made it a priority to get enough sleep because I hated the way I felt when I was sleep deprived – cranky, irritated, negative, impatient. I can’t say there are never times when I feel cranky but now when I wake up from too short a sleep I have no shortage of energy during the day. In fact, what I’m working on now is getting out of the habit of being so strict with myself about going to bed early.

My level of creativity and productivity has increased many-fold. My mind seems to always be looking for ways to expend the energy I have. I’ve been asked if it’s uncomfortable to have so much energy. I think some people imagine it feels like a caffeine high. It’s nothing like that. The energy is just always there (almost always, at least) to be used if and when life demands it.

For exercise, I walk, dance, snowshoe, hike, and do gardening or yard work. One of my favorite activities is looking for uncultivated fruit, which involves driving more than walking but is an extremely gratifying and healthy use of my time nevertheless. Here in the Pacific Northwest, it’s only possible from June till October, unfortunately. I’ve found plums, apricots, cherries, berries, grapes, figs and Asian pears. In November I foraged in California and found cactus pears, persimmons, walnuts, oranges, Meyer lemons, almonds and grapes.

Like many other people, the things I have to do for a living and even for recreation require sitting a lot, unfortunately. I have to drive 3 hours per day for my business, which I run 4 days per week. In addition, I sit at my computer for 2-3 hours everyday. When I’m not sitting, I’m working around the house and yard, walking and hiking. A typical day for me would be puttering around the house (feeding animals, housework, etc.) for an hour or so in the morning, spending an hour or two on the computer, driving and making deliveries (which also involves walking from the car to the house 7-8 times) for 3 hours, walking for an hour or two, running errands (which involves driving and walking) spending another hour or so ‘puttering’ after I get home, and another 1-2 hours on the computer. On winter evenings I read, talk on the phone, entertain visitors, watch TV, or work on a crafting project. The winter months in Seattle can be very dark and inclement, so I do tend to be less active. For exercise in the winter, in addition to my midday walk, I spend a few hours per week browsing my favorite thrift store. In the summer, I typically do at least an hour or two more walking, in addition to spending a great deal of time outdoors, including sleeping outside. Caring for my yard and garden generally takes a couple hours per week on average, more in summer than in winter. In addition, I frequently step on my Reebok step for 10 minutes or so in the mornings to get warmed up.

I continue to work on finding ways to avoid the problem of social isolation that most raw fooders experience. I’ve had to make a conscious effort to find connections with other people by focusing on the things we have in common rather than thinking about our differences. Getting involved in activities that have nothing to do with food has been helpful. When the topic of food comes up, it’s a good opportunity to practice staying low key about my personal choices and not preaching or teaching people who don’t want to be taught. I’ve come to realize that life is a lot smoother if I wait till people show genuine interest before talking to them about my diet. Being around regular cooked people also gives me opportunities to practice avoiding self-abusive habits for the sake of social acceptance, while continuing to feel good not only about myself but about the people I’m with.

Even in raw food circles, it is sometimes easier to find differences than similarities, unless one makes a concerted effort to focus on the latter. For example, raw foodism may be growing like wildfire but very few are endeavoring to stop all the perverted eating practices of civilization that create the foundation for disease and truncated longevity. The practice of unconsciously stuffing one’s face while chatting at a social gathering is not questioned, never mind discouraged. Nevertheless, meeting other raw fooders at potlucks not only gives me the chance to talk to others with whom I share the passion of being healthy – even though we may not be following the same path -- but also to work on breaking the habit of eating while socializing. I used to enjoy eating at social events, and wouldn’t think of not doing so if food was being served. However, now I like to separate socializing and eating, and I’ve been surprisingly successful at it. It is amazing to me that I now find both activities more enjoyable if I don’t combine them.

It is truly incredible to turn a corner and realize that the seeds of new habits you’ve planted have taken hold. I never would have imagined that a day would come when I could not only skip breakfast but forget about food until 3:00 in the afternoon. For my entire life, eating has been a priority that nothing else could distract me from because I hated the way I felt when I missed a meal. I don’t have breakfast-free days everyday, but recently I’ve been able to do it once every couple weeks. The part that amazes me is that when I do, it is effortless. On the few occasions I managed to skip breakfast in the past, it always required monumental effort and I had to muscle through the unpleasant symptoms.

On those occasions when I wasn’t able to skip breakfast or do without an evening meal or whatever other bad habit I was endeavoring to stop, I did what all raw fooders seem to do – I beat myself up mercilessly. Looking back, I realize that I was doing all that I could do and that there simply is no way to speed up the process of recovery from food addiction. Not only that, but I had to learn through repeated experience the difference between the way I felt when I did things the wrong way, and how great it felt when I managed to do it right. I now know that it was my mistakes as well as my accomplishments that created a foundation upon which I could build my new healthy habits.

For the last 3 weeks I’ve been keeping a diet journal that will be used as part of a book about raw foodists being written by fellow raw food enthusiast Schall Adams. Since examples of a typical day of eating are what transitioning raw fooders seem to need most from long-term raw fooders, below I’ll post a week’s worth of intake.

It is only my zeal to help other aspiring raw fooders that motivates me to share my experiences in such great detail as I’ve done here, and I’d be dishonest if I said it doesn’t make me feel slightly uncomfortable. So far there seems to have been more positive than negative come out of it, but as I get more into refining my diet and exploring related topics that can be seen by the uninitiated as ‘abnormal’ or even neurotic (!), my level of discomfort grows. I’ll just say it hasn’t escaped my awareness that if someone wanted to create grief for me, it would be easy to misconstrue or misrepresent the things I write. If people were to start doing what I’m doing en masse, whole industries would disappear, and there are obviously those who don’t want that to happen. I suppose it’s both good news and bad news that people like me don’t even represent as much of a threat to them as a fly buzzing around their heads, at least for now.

Thanks to those of you who have written to me to say how helpful these writings have been, and for providing me with the inspiration to update them periodically. I hope to do so at more frequent intervals in the future.

Best wishes,

Nora

January 22

10 am 5 grapefruits

2 pm 5 persimmons

4 pm 3 handfuls baby spinach

4:30 1 head iceberg lettuce

10 mushrooms

Dressing: 15 almonds

5 stalks celery

15 cherry tomatoes

1 Meyer lemon

January 23

9 am 3 grapefruits

10 am 3 grapefruits

11 am 1 bunch celery

11:30 ½ lb baby spinach

1:30 3 Bosc pears

2:30 2 persimmons

5:00 3 mangoes

January 24

9:15 am ½ cup juiced celery

9:30 3 apples

10 am 2 small honeydews

2 pm 1 durian

January 25

10 am ¾ cup juiced celery

10:30 5 apples, peeled

2:15 pm ¾ pound blueberries

3:30 1 cantaloupe

5 pm Fruit salad: ½ apple, 15 grapes, 2 oranges, 4 bananas

January 26

11:30 am 1 bunch celery, ½ juiced

12 pm 1 mango

12:30 2 pears

2:30 1 pineapple

4:30 6 ounces cashews

1 head iceberg lettuce

January 27

2:15 pm 2 cantaloupes

3:30 ½ pound grapes

5:30 3 apples

½ pound dates

January 28

11:15 1 cantaloupe

1:30 ½ durian

5:30 ½ durian